birthday/housewarming ;D

So my house had like twenty strands of hair

So my "ash's 18th" sign was illegible from the lift

So the food wasn't catered-standard in terms of presentation

So there were no games or activities...

I learnt that all that was superficial

Who cared about stuff like that?

I read somewhere once, that HOME is not a place - it's a time.

You can only feel truly at home with the people you love around you.

Home isn't home if you're alone in a house. That's just solitude.

In the same way, a party isn't a place - it's a time.

A time when I'm blessed to celebrate my 18th with the darlings that have seen me through my two years in college. The very same people who were at some periods the only reason that drew me towards the college. And these are the people I'm going to remember for a long time to come. ( to those who say 2 years is too short a time to make true friends - i say bull.)

The party could have been held at a lavish bungalow, complete with a pool and backyard

The party food could have been an on-site barbecue with on-site chefs

The decorations could have been absolutely stunning

Music blasted from surrounding top of the line speakers

But it wouldn't have been half as successful as the celebration on Saturday, 091010

If my friends weren't present.

Ask me what I want for my birthday

I want to blessed with sincere, loving friends.

Their presence is more than any present I could possibly receive.

NUMBERSEVEN

haha, Ahmed, Calvin and Jac have been commenting about how this must-be list is so one-sided and kinda over-the-top? Like a fantasy list.

So to clear up any confusion or dissatisfaction,

1) the list is purely my opinion - just a non-exhaustive, non-conclusive guide for guys

2) it is one sided because this guide is for guys... If any of you would like to compose one for girls (to enable us to understand you queer martians better) by all means, please do so(:

Today's topic #7: Be True to Yourself

(see, this isn't that bad is it?)

As far as I'm concerned, I know I cannot stand "masks" - identities, actions, personalities and whatnot that are employed to hide one's true colours. If she loves you for you, there's no need to put on a mask. To a certain extent, though, we all do that. In different situations, we act differently.

Take this scenario as an example: you are fun-loving, life-of-the-party, happy-go-lucky guy. When the day comes to meet her parents, you suddenly turn shy, awkwardly polite and boring (relatively). These masks aren't necessarily bad - they form the foundation of your image to a new person lest people are quick to judge and form opinions without first knowing you better.

The masks I'm referring to, are masks employed when it's just you and her. She fell in love with you (hopefully, not your masked-self) so don't be swayed by (other) people's opinion that you should look different or be different.

Moral today? Don't feel inadequate - if she matters most to you, her opinions (not anyone else's) of you should carry you through the relationship.

#8

#8. Be spontaneous

If you're the kind of guy who needs a schedule to go by, coupled with a daily to-do list, grocery lists and a real-time updated contact list... this is for you.

Being in a relationship requires work (no joke) and from time to time, it should come in the form of something...extra-ordinary. Spontaneous surprises, that is.

And before you jump to conclusions that such "surprises" have to be expensive or in any way tangible... think again. Depending on what you're comfortable with, and what she'd be over-the-moon about, (refer to Five Love Languages by Dr Gary Chapman), it can range from a bouquet of flowers (or even a stalk really) to walking her to school without previously arranging to do so (hence. surprise).

These spontaneous acts may seem like a tall order. But really, it can be simple and equally heartfelt. Drop a note into her wallet when she's not looking or offer to let her decide on which movie to watch. Bring her on a date she's never experienced or to some place she's never been... The list goes on.

But the main point is, to add that spark of excitement to your relationship once in a while. Not so because "things are getting mediocre/boring" but more so because you want her to be happy(:

"Love is when the other person's happiness is more important than your own"

Moral of today's story: Do something. Something she wouldn't suspect. Something... smile-inducing ;D

migraine

from being a major lazyworm:(

anyhow, that's besides the point. I wanted to rant because...

My dad just managed to use the following words on me in a span of... 10 minutes

A) Debtor

B) Bum

C) Potential cancer victim.

Why? Because I exceeded my monthly mobile plan quota for 100 minutes and 600 texts by 70 minutes and 60 texts.

Honestly, I don't remember my counter going up so high...

Secondly, he thinks I'm going to end up a debtor and a bum in life because i spend money before i start earning a cent. (Guess what, we're al doomed. We all spent money on diapers and milk powder the day we were born. And goodness, education too!?)

Thirdly. I'm getting a headache from staring intently at the screen ignoring his,

"Your-daughter-is-getting-out-of-hand", nag to my mom.

Okay, so. If i stop calling/texting, i apologise in advance

#9

And this brings me back to my Ashley's idea of a list of MUST-BEs for clueless guys who think women/ladies/girls/female sex should come with an instruction manual.

#9 is the topic of discussion today.

#9. Be a part - not apart

As a couple, it is essential that the two of you are together (no shit right?). And not just intimately or emotionally as mentioned in #10. The whole idea of this is summed up with that song from Spice Girls-Wannabe

"If you wannabe my lover, you gotta get with my friends". I've always had this idea that once a relationship was underway, the said couple should be sharing. Sharing secrets, laughs, memories, time... And most importantly-sharing lives.

The whole definition of a relationship is based on connection. How then can you expect to remain only a couple when it's convenient? Or when you two have alone-time. What I'm implying is, she should not be a complete stranger to the people or the things you care about. And vice versa.

If she likes shopping - suck it up. Try to have fun while she's picking out a dress for your next date. If your friends mean the world to you, arrange for both parties to meet. Don't be exclusive and all mysterious to others around you. Because the moment your relationship status on FB changes, people don't just look at you as... you. You become him and her.

Just last Friday, when i went back to my alma mater, I was bombarded with boyfriend questions. It started off with, "Where's he?" and then on to "Tell me more!" So basically, if she matters to you, then she belongs to the list of things/people that matter to you. Once you two start being more involved with each others' lives, it builds a stronger foundation for further... development? Capiche?

And as always:

The moral of the story today- 愛屋及烏. If you truly want to be ONE, it involves a lot more than her alone. The Chinese saying is translated roughly to mean, "If you love a house, love the crow that lives there"