I had ended my last two tests on Wednesday and to celebrate (though I was extremely exhausted) I wanted to do something. I could've gone home and spent an early night with snacks in bed. But I wanted to Live. And so I did. I Lived spontaneously and decided on a whim to head down to UTown's Rockfest. With Juan, pizza, Somersby and what might pass as music, I had a great great night.
On Thursday, it was one long day starting way too early. But I'd made a commitment to my future 8am lectures, so I dragged my body to LT12. After that, I wanted breakfast, and was almost resigned to having it alone. Till Juan came along and obliged me with company!
In the evening, I was close to sleeping while climbing. But it was project day. And I was committed to finishing the purple route. So after two warm-ups, I climbed on. I kept repeating to myself:
"You will do this. You will finish it."
"Don't ask for tight, keep going"
"The xiao meis are learning to lead fall, if you're going to fall, you will do a proper lead fall."
And with that, I finished my project route. Perhaps a little later than I would have liked. But I was pleased, nonetheless. I was happy about training for once in a long time. "When the body fails, the MIND takes over" - that day, I really believed so.
On Friday night, my third day back in UTown, I watched "Will you still Love me if I'm ___?" It was a double-bill. Two plays, one by Jaryl, the latter by our dearest Gwen.
Two Happy Sons. It wasn't the theme of sexuality and personal choices that really rocked me. Instead, I felt impelled to stand and applaud because of the relationships in the play. Mothers and their Sons. Especially in Scene 6: Coming Out. It made me wonder how much our parents know about us. The things we choose to hide from them. A conscious effort on our part to keep secrets, which turn into lies and stories, and finally an unconscious action altogether. It made me think about the stereotypes in society and how true/false these images are. It made me consider God and religion. The way we treat Him like an answering machine, someone to go to only in times of doubt and in search of solutions. I loved the play. And like I've told Jaryl, he's a genius.
Two in the Morning. I'd read the play before Asher and Annie played it out. And though there were times I wished the acting was less pretentious and showy, I cared less about the actors and I cared more about the story. The story of two people. Who were too close to be friends, and too messed up to be more. And I felt so much for Gwen's story. Because I know exactly what that's like off-stage. It's underlying messages are sad despite Gwen's signature interjections of humour and wit. Jo asked why I was crying 'cos it ended well right?
"How did your version of us getting together begin?"
"With a kiss."
No. I don't think it did. And that's what made me sad. It's the whole parallel lines story once again - two lines who have so much in common but never ever get together. Alaric and Bianca were so damn close. To be absolutely truthful and honest to each other, in all ways. There was never a need to mask their true selves. No awkwardness, nothing to be politically correct about. Is that not what we all strive to have in our friendships and relationships? Yet the tragedy at the end of the day - that kind of relationship doesn't come with its own flaws and compromises. And yes, that's sad.
After crying (ya la, I always), we took the usual group photos to show the world how lucky we are to have each other in our lives. I know I'll never find another group of friends like the TJCCCClimbers. Through all the ups and downs that sums up 4 years, we still find the time for each other :)
On Saturday, I made myself wake up at 7 to go down to Macritchie Reservoir. I was there to support Shawn and I had time only for one race, he obviously didn't disappoint, emerging first in his 1000m heats. And later on 3rd for finals, but within 1.5s of the winner.
On Sunday, I also supported someone dear to me - my brother, Bryan. I was shaken awake at noon (don't judge) to go down to 100 Guillemard Road. Yes, you may recognise that as Onsight Climbing Gym. But that also was the venue for the IHL (Institute of Higher Learning) Cheerleading Championships - GymKraft that is. Korkor had trained hard for this for a long time. And an unfortunate accident kept him away from competing this time, but I knew I wanted to see what routine he was so excited to perform. I met a few old friends there too. And sat in the suffocating stands with hundreds of other supporters and cheered my lungs out for NUS (Alpha Vimbz, Alpha Verve), NTU (Nee Meng) and of course, KR Steppers.
The team didn't fail me or Bryan, much like all I've talked about in this post. The emerged champions in the 16-man A Division category. All that hard work really paid off. And I could sense the disappointment in the others. It's like all of that goes to waste. They say winning isn't everything. Really though?
